He’s Gonna Get You, He’s Gonna Get You, He’s Gonna Get You (The Boogeyman is Coming): Halloween
It’s time for my due diligence.
This is the spooky season, so it’s only fitting that we talk about spooky movies.
There is no shortage on the movie I’m discussing today. In fact, it’s over-discussed. But because this movie sits in my Top 10 all-time favorites, I gotta make a pass at it.
Halloween. Michael Myers. The Shape.
The first time I saw Halloween wasn’t the original. It was Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers.
I was probably too young to watch Michael Myers drive his thumb into the forehead of a medic crew. But I saw it. And it was life-changing.
Being a young boy, I was naturally drawn to action flicks. (Schwarzenegger was my favorite.) But this was different.
After seeing what Michael Myers did in the ambulance, I remember thinking about hands differently. Usually bad guys in movies had guns or bombs or weapons — or if they used their hands it was to punch. Normal shit. The man I saw hurting the ambulance medics only used his hands.
Thumbs driven through a forehead. Hands to slam their heads.
From then on, I was fascinated.
I watched the sequels before I saw the original. Halloween 2, Halloween 5, and from there I got into the Friday the 13th franchise … naturally.
Everything’s Fine!
The original 1978 Halloween eventually turned into a family thing with me. My mom had stories about seeing it when it was first released. My Grandma and Grandpa remembered the stories well and confirmed them. And then here I was, enjoying the same thing.
We sound odd, don’t we?
By the time the 1998 release of Halloween: H20 came around, with an appearance of Janet Leigh, there was something generational about the whole franchise.
A billion horror fans have done what I’m about to do here. Do not feel the need to keep reading. But because this world was so influential to me in my early years, here is how I rank the Halloween installments:
1. Halloween, 1978
2. Halloween H20: 20 Years Later
3. Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers
4. Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers
5. Halloween 2: The Nightmare Continues
6. Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers
7. Halloween 3: Season of the Witch (Does Not Feature Myers)
8. Halloween, 2007
I don’t list Halloween: Resurrection because I can’t list Halloween: Resurrection. It’s potentially the worst decision in filmmaking franchise history.
Yep, worse than Jason X.
It might be the single biggest disappointment I’ve ever encountered with respect to movies. It makes no sense and it gives me a stomachache when I think about it. I grew up with a massive crush on Tyra Banks. But not even she could help this movie. Nothing — nothing — can help this movie.
I also don’t include David Gordon Greene’s Halloween reboot. I saw the first one and didn’t like it.
I know it has the blessing of John Carpenter, particularly because it’s a different interpretation of Myers. In this reboot Myers and Strode are not related. I think it’s all good and dandy for this interpretation. Does it make Myers scarier from Laurie’s perspective? No question. And it provides more mystery to motivation.
I don’t think Halloween 2018 was shot poorly. I don’t think it is a bad horror movie by itself, adjusted for its current competition and current audiences.
But I think it is an artistically pointless endeavor.
I try to block it out. I may come around to watching the next two installments, Halloween Kills and Halloween Ends, but I have about 30 years invested in a different story line.
The kills that I remember from Halloween 2018 are reminiscent of kills I’ve seen in all the previous movies. For me, the whole thing is not necessary.
Necessary? Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine? No, but I do it anyway because it’s sterile and I like the taste.
- Dodgeball (2004)
Why Do You Have Halloween 5 over Halloween 2007?
Because I like it more.
Barring Halloween: Resurrection, many aficionados call it the worst installment in the franchise. If we capped it off at H20, I would agree with you. But we don’t cap it off at H20. And even if I were to include Halloween 2018 in my ratings, I still would put 5 over Halloween 2007.
Look, Halloween 5 is not a good example. It’s full of fuckups and it begins a far-fetched plotline that takes us into the sixth installment, The Curse of Michael Myers.
I have never been able to understand what they did to Michael’s house. It is totally different in this movie compared to the others. It’s disheartening because the best scenes in the movie take place inside the Myers house.
The climax of the movie — Jamie in the upstairs room, the showdown inside the house — are strong moments. When Loomis talks to Michael in the livingroom and all that happens after …
It was haunting to a young boy.
What’s Up with 2007?
It has its moments.
I appreciate the evilness of other characters in the movie — Michael’s childhood bullies and that bastard Ronnie White, for example. That’s something the original didn’t have.
In the original, maybe Linda and Annie were drinking and banging (or trying to), but that isn’t evilness. What Michael endured as a kid in 2007 was blatantly wrong.
I didn’t like the size of adult Michael, the mask — both its condition and the hocus pocus surrounding it — or the Loomis character.
What appealed to me about Myers in all the previous installments was his normal size.
He’s The Shape, not The Monster.
Michael is overly humanized in the 2007 reboot. All the mystery is taken out of it, for the worse.
Why the Original?
Is it only because it’s the original?
In terms of which one I enjoy the most, I might have to go with Halloween 4. It’s the one I look forward to rewatching the most.
In terms of which one I enjoy thinking about the most, it’s a toss-up between The Curse of Michael Myers and the packaged story of the original, 2, and H20.
In considering everything, from script to acting, from plot to theme song, the original is the best because it delivers on all the promises and does so without:
1. Overcomplicating things
2. Overexplaining things and
3. Cheapening itself.
But to keep from rambling, I’ll revisit this in my own sequel on the matter.
